Reading a lot about happiness in many media outlets, I have noticed, that there is a lot of talk about how positive thinking is or can be dangerous.
Perhaps I have managed to read only the suitable passages in books and articles about happiness. But never once did it occur to me, that being happy would mean denying some of the feelings I have inside me.
Quite the contrary.
Excluding feelings – fear, anxiety, tiredness, overbearing stress, dissatisfaction – is an excellent habit if you are intrested in building a volcano inside yourself, that is inevitably going to blow up. Tried that!
Spiritual growth, becoming happier, becoming a better version of yourself… Whatever you want to call it -is going to force you to face all those difficult feelings, you might have been hiding for years.
By trying to avoid certain feelings, I think I’ve become a bit confused about my own personality even. Being busy trying to make people like me, instead of just being me. Not owning up to the fact if I’m feeling hurt, for fear of being abandoned. Doing what is expected of me (by whose standards – I don’t know…) instead of just doing what I want.
So yes, I need to acknowledge all my feelings. Because without acknowledging what makes me smile, how can I ever imagine having a more positive outlook on life? Then again, without understanding my deepest fears, how am I ever going to put myself back together in one piece?
It’s not always a pleasure rummaging through the hidden corners of your mind.
There’s not much more you can do though. I mean… If you carry in your heart pain, troubles, negative thoughts that are hurting you, they will find you in your new job, in your new house and most definitely in every relationship.
In order to be happier, I try to understand my pain, cherish my smile and let all of my colors be a part of me.
How do you understand happiness? Is it a state of 100% pure sunshine, or more about accepting the possibility that things are most likely not going to be perfect all day, every day?
Some articles in finnish about positivity and happiness:
And something in English: